Dreams

I was talking with a close friend a few days ago about the volatile nature of dreams. I'm not talking about sleeping dreams, but the waking ones. We all have them; day job as an accountant, but really wishing the etsy account would take off and lead to self-employment. Or the stay at home mom who really wants to get back in the classroom. Or the intro to painting class you've known about for months. There's a million examples.

But somehow by saying our dreams out loud, they seem so impossible, or worse yet, impractical. It seems to be the nature of dreams, that they do not fit in a cookie cutter world that says college, career, marriage, house, kids, retirement. In that order. In the expected timeframe. Or else.

Or else what, though?!

We are so concerned about our safety. Going into unchartered territory can be lonesome. There's no roadmap that tells you when you're too far from the conventional. And what would people think?

When I was considering leaving teaching and education all together, one of my pre-occupations was what I would tell people. What will be my story? I would think. I imagined a dinner party scene where everyone's sharing names, careers, families . . . and what would I jump in with?

I'm an education policy professor.

That sounds good. People get that. That sounds respectable.

I'm a medium and holistic healer.

Hmmm. That one doesn't roll off the tongue so well. That's going to get blank stares. Questions. Ridicule maybe? I don't like that.

But you know what, I can't even think of the last dinner party I've been to. In the famous words of Fred Armesen playing Joy Behar on The View, "So what?! Who cares?!" So you get some weird stares. So you have some offbeat conversations. So people don't think you're playing it safe. And?

What truly wonderful idea has ever sounded practical or safe? Do you think the guy who came up with the Chia Pet cared what people thought of him? Olympic athletes begin training as kids, giving up countless "being a kid" moments for the dream of getting to the games.

So if you've been considering taking a jump of any kind, really, consider this blog post God's way of saying, "Hey, c'mon now, let's get going."

If you need more convincing, check out this reading of a short essay by author Kelly Corrigan.

I Want, I Need, I Want

It seems like we are always being encouraged to ask for exactly what we want.

Please God, help me find a job.
Please angels, help me find love.

Or on some days, it's as simple as

God, let me get 8 hours of sleep tonight.

You see a lot of this same sentiment in the new agey and self help books. Ask for what you want. Make your intentions clear. Create a vision board. Yadda Yadda Yadda. But lately I've grown weary of being so, well, demanding. Of asking for so much all the time. Frankie Says Relax, right?

So last week, while I was walking Rocky on our daily trip to the park, I focused my mind on a list of thanks. It started slowly at first. Thanks for this beautiful park. Thanks for Rocky. But as I kept walking, the list of gratitude got longer and longer. From time to time, I felt tempted to turn the gratitude into a request.

Thank you for Rocky's health, and please continue to . . . Oops. I mean, thanks for Rocky's health. Period.

There's real beauty in loving something exactly the way it is right now. No hoping for it to be better tomorrow, no asking for improvement, but just recognizing how wonderful it is. Right now. It was a beautiful walk. Give it a try.

What You Can't See

It was nighttime, and I was driving back from another expo, going through rural Indiana at around 9pm. I was just daydreaming and reflecting when a field next to the highway began to blink with red lights. It was the simplest thing, but it was gorgeous. In a field in the middle of nowhere, these red, twinkling lights lit up an expansive field.

I just enjoyed the show and marveled at the beauty. And it made me think about the beauty in the dark, and the beauty of things we can't see. Often, when I am reading for someone, I feel like I am watching a movie that no one can see but myself. It's like trying to describe the beauty of a sunset to someone who cannot see. It's just lost in translation sometimes.

We just need to have more faith that there is beauty and love even in places where we can't see it.

My Road Trip Game

So on my way back from Columbus, Ohio (cute town and good people b.t.w.) I played the Spiritual Radio Game that I just mentioned. I didn't ask any specific questions, I just said, "Tell me what you want me to know." I stopped on a 70's/80's/90's/miscellaneous station, and I unexpectedly got a response to a question I was asking.

From time to time, I feel drawn to getting a tattoo. Almost like the string-around-the-finger effect, I've been thinking of getting something that will remind me of my purpose on Earth. A constant reminder on my wrist. I asked my angels, and in so many words, they said no. Like a stubborn teenager, I argued my case: it's spiritual in nature. It will make me a better person.

Still no.

So of course I laughed and let the issue go (for now) after their very clear response with the Radio game.

The first song comes on, and it's Tom Petty. In the first verse, he sings:

"Eddie waited 'til he finished high school
He went to Hollywood, got a tattoo
He met a girl out there with a tattoo too
The future was wide open"

Now they've gotten my attention! They've said tattoo twice, and hey, I've been thinking about getting one! I listen through the second half of the first verse, waiting for any message about their thoughts on these tattoo kids, and then Tom Petty breaks my heart:

"Out in the great wide open
A rebel without a clue"

Ouch. And there you have it. So I don't have a clue. Got it. Say no more. Should I read into the fact that his name is Tom Petty? Maybe.

But no, they weren't done yet.

Next song on the docket? I laughed at the intro because I knew what was coming. Yes, my angels are using Frankie Goes to Hollywood to make sure I don't get a tattoo.

"Relax don't do it
When you want to go do it"

Aright. I got it. It's a bad idea.

And juuuuuust because they like to mess with me I suppose, after Frankie convinced me to relax, a radio station commercial came on that featured a fanatical radio fan getting a tattoo for the radio station and then spelling it wrong. Ha. Ha.

So I realize that they want me to close this case on the whole tattoo issue . . . but maybe if I ask them next weekend . . .

(Disclaimer: I don't believe Angels are against all tattoos for everyone! But apparently it's not good for my divine plan.)

And for fun and love of Petty, here's a lovely vintage video. Check out Johnny Depp, ladies!

Spiritual Road Trip Games

Thank you God for spring! After a long winter, not only is it getting warmer and the daylight is getting longer, but I'm out on the road all over the Midwest meeting new people and growing as a human being. Can it get any better?

With all of these expos, I'm spending a lot of time in the car. Here's a game for you that can mix it up from the old stand-by's like the license plate game or I Spy.

All you need is your car radio with a scan button. Pray, meditate, etc. for a few minutes, asking God, angels, and helpers to use this time of solitude to speak to you through music. Ask that they send you any messages you need to hear. Try to let them do the talking; don't ask any questions. Just simply ask, "What would you like me to know?"

Then, let the radio scan. Stop on a song you feel drawn to, and see what songs come up in the next few minutes. It's really fun! I'll tell you about my funny experience . . .

Confession

Bless me father, for I have sinned. It's been 13 days since my last blog post.

Oneness by Jeffrey Moses

I really don't know how to best explain this work. Oneness by Jeffrey Moses has a simple premise with a large impact. It's a compilation of the truths that can be found in most/all major religions. The beauty is that there's actually quite a bit of overlap when it comes to beliefs about life, love, and God.

Each page is so highly concentrated with wisdom. Just by reading at an average pace, you could get through the entire book in an afternoon. But this is the kind of book where you could spend 20 minutes mulling over 20 words. It's simple and profound.

Oh, and I almost forgot to mention the introduction by Mother Theresa! Oh my lord. Gorgeous.

I love the library and I check out 90% of what I read to save trees, money, and to support the common library. But this book is on my list of books to buy. When the world seems messy and the divine feels so far away and unclear, this is the book you need.